Maddy (mdnghtmdnss1111) wrote in 0eat_a_sandwich,

have you ever been SO ANGRY that you can actually feel your blood literally boiling and popping all your veins??? !!!!!!!LKJDASFLKHASLKHAFHASFKJNASFKH I AM SO PISSED I CAN'T EVEN. AAGH!

Yesterday, I fasted successfully and it felt SO FUCKING GOOD. Until dinner when I was on my way out to the mall where I would be "eating" when my parents made me eat at home with them so they could "monitor" it. I AM STILL SHAKING WITH RAGE!!!!!!

what's wrong with me?? eating a little bit makes you lose faster than fasting. and alleviates suspision. and. gah. i hate me. so that was thursday. friday i screwed the fast. shall i fast this weekend? i'm think alternating fasting and eating tiny bits will be really successful. just the problem is parents. or the option is fast all the time unless forced to eat. which actually works well. but. hmmm. ugh. i want to fast 100%. i live for that. i get high from that pretty much. gross. i'm so stupid. but, i do what i have to do. and i have to do this.
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